Narrator: Nick Offerman, Wyatt Cenac, John O’Hurley, Maria Bamford, David Spade, Patton Oswalt, Natasha Leggero, Lewis Black, Tommy Chong, Nick Thune, Tony Hale, Phoebe Robinson, & Brent Weinbach
Title: Bedtime Stories for Cynics
Genre: Fiction, Comedy, Fantasy, & short stories
Published: November, 2016
Where I Got It: My shelf (Audible)
The closest you'll get to having Parks and Recreation's Ron Swanson read you a bedtime story, this sharp and silly series features inappropriate children's stories for adults only – performed by masters of the comedic arts.
This came with “12” episodes. Such a fun format. At the beginning of each one, Nick Offerman does a little intro. At the end of some of them, he will say a couple of words too. He was funny as per normal. Such a fun collection.
Ep. 1 ‘Goodnight Ambien’ read by Wyatt Cenac
Hilarious and clever. I do think this was Nick Offerman’s best intro. The first is always hard to beat. It really does reflect the night of an insomniac. A good chuckle. The narrator of the story was very good and he made it even better.
“Good night every embarrassing memory from the last 15 years suddenly popping into my head…” That line did it for me! Hahahahahaha. So much truth. 5 stars
Ep. 2 ‘Daddies’ read by John O’Hurley
The intro was the second best. It was a close tie to the first one.
This one was a hair sad. Funny, yes, but sad and has lots of truth to it. The narrator’s voice is one you’ll remember. I feel like he does everything. I want to listen to more from him. I bet he would do great at other audios. The ending fun a dark ending, but funny of course. 4 stars
Ep. 3 ‘Goldilocks’ read by Maria Bamford
Funny as per normal. It really reminded me of Ron Swanson from P&R.
Some chuckles but overall, meh. The narrator was okay. I liked her different voices for all the characters. She is new to me, so I’m not familiar. The ending was the funniest part. Not a bad remake of the original. I’ll give it 3 stars.
Ep. 4 ‘Heinz Linge and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day’ read by David Spade
The intro was not as good as the others. But still pretty funny overall.
David Spade is always a hoot. The story was good and a very interesting take on the story. Oooo Nazis. You evil bastards. But they are hilarious being the butt of jokes. Very funny overall. Guess even Nazis have bad days. LOL. Totally didn’t expect the ending. I’ll give this 4 stars.
Ep. 5 ‘The Frog Prince’ read by Patton Oswalt
Another just an okay intro. Not bad, but not as good as the others.
Love the narrator. He makes me roll on the floor with laughter. His girl voice killed me with this one! Ugh. The whole frog story always bugs me (even when I was little I didn’t care for the story). This remake was a good one and how I would imagine the story would’ve really went. The ending was hilarious and the princess had it coming. 4 stars for this one.
Ep. 6 ‘The Empress’ New Bangs’ read by Natasha Leggero
Intro was okay. No issues.
Funny, but a little underwhelming. It had its moments, but the rest didn’t really make me laugh. Loved the narrator though. She was good. I’ll give it 2 stars.
Ep. 7 ‘Todd the Dragon Slayer’ read by Lewis Black
The intro got me for some reason. I listened to it a couple of times. Simple, but good. This quote is what really gets me, because it rings so true, “If you find yourself offended by the language in this story, then you are a child. Congratulations. You have your whole life ahead of you. Don’t Fuck it up”
The story was good as well. I listened to it a couple of times as well. Ooooo that dragon! Lewis Black, as per normal, entertaining and knows how to make everything hilarious! I want to listen more to him. 5 stars overall.
Ep. 8 ‘The Turtle and the Rabbit’ read by Tommy Chong
Oooo Nick Offerman. You make me laugh. This was good and the best part.
The story was meh. The narrator just okay even though I find him funny normally. Super bummed. I’ll give it 2 stars.
Ep. 9 ‘Casey in the Sack’ read by Nick Thune
This was overall clever and had a couple of laughs (including the intro), but eh. Another meh one. I’ll give it 2 stars just for the cleverness.
Ep. 10 ‘Open House’ read by Tony Hale
Intro was okay.
Ooo! What a fun and funny story. It is told in the format of a poem and it was clever. It was sad too, but overall sidesplitting. Poor Maggie and her hubbie! The ending was the cherry on top. I’ll give this 5 stars.
Ep. 11 ‘The Very Thirsty Caterpillar’ read by Phoebe Robinson
A good intro. Had me laughing. Very dark and informative.
Eh. It had a few chuckles. The only good part was the fact about how darkly true this is. I totally get what they were after and I feel like it didn’t work well. The narrator did well though. I’ll give it 2 stars.
Ep. 12 ‘Caramello’ read by Brent Weinbach
HAHAHAHA “foot fetish”. Oooooh Nick Offerman.
Eh. Another one that gave a few chuckles, but overall meh. I honestly zoned out near the end there. 1 star for this one.
This was funny even the meh ones still had some laughs. I’ll for sure re-listen to my favorites here and there since they are legit only a few minutes long. It was free and if you are a cynic and like darker, true, and inappropriate humor I would suggest listening to this collection. *does math*. I’ll round this out to about 3 stars. Worth the listen.